Peter Bregman, in the Harvard Business Review, wrote an interesting article this week about what motivates people to help. If you haven’t seen it yet, follow that link and have a look. Peter raises an interesting question about why people are motivated to give to others, to help.
In general, people like to be helpful. I suppose part of it is an expectation of getting something in return, but that’s not the core.
The fact is, you get a rush just from knowing you’ve done good. It actually physically feels good to you, and in many cases that may be enough reward in itself.
Of course, we get rather cynical about all this. Many charitable organizations prey on our need to be loved and to feel like we’re making a difference. After a while we get the sense that maybe we’re not actually making the difference that we’d hoped, and that some of the unscrupulous types might be taking advantage of us.
That’s why Peter’s example is so powerful. It’s about making a difference to someone here and now, in a way that makes a difference that you can actually see.
Here’s what we learn about giving:
Let people see the difference they’re making, in as immediate a way as possible, and in the way that person values.
Entering payment into the equation introduces a whole different dynamic – it becomes about the money rather than about the value delivered.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help. People like helping.
How do you convince people to like you and give you a break?
Here’s a core principle of human behavior, so simple: When people receive something they value, they’re more inclined to give back in return. Pretty obvious, right? But it’s absolutely true, and is one of the reasons why those charities send you small gifts in the mail. They’re hoping you’ll find some value in them, and give back in return.
I heard a great presentation by Edward Hernandez in Denver last week which was quite interesting. He was talking about one of my hot topics at the moment, employee engagement. I thought I’d share with you an additional observation which I believe is much more important than it first seems:
As the economy rebounds, companies will be reluctant to hire full-time employees. Fairly obvious, right? But this has broad implications.
On this blog, I’ve talked a lot about career issues, but let’s face it: That’s only a part of who You are. I would hope that you recognize that there’s other important areas of your life: your family, spiritual growth, your physical self, contribution to important causes, your social circles – and perhaps more.
Your Authentic Self is the person underlying all that.
Well, we survived the first decade of the third millennium. It’s been an amazing and ever-accelerating ride for me, and I hope that you can see your own sparks of potential which will help you build your own future success.
As the year and the decade draw to a close, I just wanted to express my gratitude for all the help I’ve received this year. It’s been tumultuous, the future is uncertain, and depression and fear still reign over the economy.
Despite all that, I’ve been blessed with a great number of friends and supporters, a wonderful number of opportunities, and the love of my family. If you’re going to lose your job and head off into a new career, it’s hard to ask for more.
Thank you.
Now let’s get to work on making 2010 a much better place!
When I was growing up as a child in the 1960s, I thought about the upcoming turn of the century – 2000 seemed so impossibly far away. But here we are, ten years AFTER entering this new millennium, and it’s disappeared so quickly!
Ten years I was employed in Hewlett-Packard, just beginning to discover this new emerging field called coaching. I was managing a team that was embroiled in the whole Y2K issue, worried that all our hard preparation might not have been enough to ward off customer problems on January 1st. As it turns out, things went remarkably well.
Sometimes it seems like I’m hard-wired to look for risks, for dangers. Perhaps I am. So here’s a powerful question that I use to help break me out of that mindset:
Nobody likes a braggart. But there are times where you need to promote yourself – to your boss, to potential customers, to future employers. How do you promote yourself in a way which doesn’t come across as shameless and inauthentic?
Here’s the trick: You promote in a way which is well-founded, or where promotion isn’t the primary message.
When I was growing up as a child in the 1960s, I thought about the upcoming turn of the century – 2000 seemed so impossibly far away. But here we are, ten years AFTER entering this new millennium, and it’s disappeared so quickly!
Sometimes it seems like I’m hard-wired to look for risks, for dangers. Perhaps I am. So here’s a powerful question that I use to help break me out of that mindset:
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